Almost Ready

It's getting close!

It's got me thinking about the journey to this point....most of it seems hazy and frustrated but I attribute it to the epic transition! It has been magical, sometimes painful, frustrating, mind blowingly amazing, humbling, enlightening...completely worth it and necessary.

I love you, little Runa! Your Daddy loves you so much! He bought the material to make a cast of us while your tiny body is inside me still ^_^ he is so excited! I am so happy to see him light up when he talks about you. We have our differences, but one thing we know is how much you are loved! I'm so glad we share ideals on how to raise you and nurture you. I know it won't be easy but knowing that we support each other makes it a lot less daunting.

I'm so tired of feeling tired. ^_^

Not Too Long Now...

Well it's getting down to the wire...it's felt like an eternity but now all of a sudden the time seems to be flying! In one week Mimi is having our first baby shower at Camellia's Sin Tea Parlor. Then the following weekend Aunt Autumn is having one for you too ^_^ Then about 3 weeks after that is your due date!

I can feel all the outlines of your tiny body inside my belly. I can tell what is a knee, or a foot, or a hand...in fact every once in a while I can see the out line of fingers through my skin and I swell with pride and amazement! I can't wait to pull you from the water and feel your skin against my naked chest.

Today I mused about what your skin will smell like, and watching you make your way to my breast to bring forth my body's natural and innate ability to feed you. I imagine those first few hours of your life here, quiet and exciting...finding out how much your little body weighs, seeing the change in your Daddy and watching him experience the greatest love of his life all over again...only this time so much more so than our wedding day ^_^

My head and heart are filled with thoughts of tiny hands and feet...a fuzzy crowning head...tiny baby lips and toothless gums. I wonder how your cry will sound...and if all these active nights have anything to do with how you will be when you arrive (which is fine with me, Mama's a night owl too!)

Oh Runa, you are already so loved and anticipated...I just cannot wait to meet you. I was thinking about how while you weren't a solid, written down planned baby, in my heart I planned you before I even met your Daddy. I knew I wanted to meet Mr. Right when I was 23, and 2 months before I turned 24, I met your Dad! I knew I wanted to get married at 24 or 25, and December 6, 2008, your Dad and I eloped in Hawaii (I was 24). And finally I knew by 25 or 26 I wanted to be seriously considering pregnancy...and about a week after my 26th birthday, I found out you were growing in my belly!

Had we waited to plan a baby, I would not have realized that I am meant for greater things than dealing in sales and numbers at some soul-less corporate entity. I might still be earning an income and spending it all on clothes and "stuff" to fill a void I just couldn't place but felt so overwhelmed by.

Because of you I now understand who I am and how to make my life useful. I care for others in a deeper way, and I understand the importance of nurturing and health. I do a better job with being compassionate with myself. I waste less time with people who clearly have no intention of being helpful and positive, and devote more time to people who are connected with the Earth and who have a good idea of natural laws.

You make us whole in a way no one else ever could, our first little love. I continue to be in complete awe of how you teach me more about love than I ever imagined could exist.

Food Blog

I has been feeling an itchy wrist to start making quilts....and maxi dresses. And baby maxi dress cocoons...^_^

There is a hole in the couch where the rear of this pregnant mama sits every day. Husband said his Mum wants to get us a recliner sectional for the baby and that makes me feel excited! I imagine it in maroon...and how much b.s. Ima hafta take about the cats and getting them declawed. Luckily it's expensive and we don't have the money!

I have ordered the birth tub liner ^_^ Waiting on it to arrive! Listed tons of vintage earrings on etsy: girltwinexchange There's also some vintage clothing, of which, I have more to list! Being home has allowed for me to have more time for these things...which I think I am going to enjoy doing more and more as I figure out my groove of getting it all in some kind of schedule.

Another client I had once had from Ulta called this week. Surprise surprise, their arch expert is horrible and their salon hasnt satisfied her. ^_^ So i have to give her a calla nd set something up before baby arrives.

Runa is very active and strong! I say this all the time but it's become my mantra for her! I want to raise a strong confident daughter who has been prepared for life. If she's anything like us, she will be sensitive and artistic and it can be hard when your feelers are naturally set to 'hyper aware'. My belly just ripples with her little elbows and knees and feet!

My body is doing better lately than it has however my throat up around my ears inside has been feeling like it could be sore. I have been planning our meals and lunches more closely lately and it seems to be having a really positive effect on my peace of mind. More salads and fruit options need to be the majority of our diets, no matter if we want to eat them or not. Once you push yourself to be healthier, the need for garbage food (our bodies doesn't process well anyhow) becomes obsolete.

I am begining to become keener with what gets wasted and what is used soonest as well. It seems in
7 full days we went through about

5 gallons of spring water
2 cartons of milk
3 cartons of juice

(cartons are half gallons I believe)

1.5 bags of salad greens
2.5 loaves of bread
one small salad dressing
1.5 containers of trail mix with nuts and fruit and chocolate
1.5 containers of almonds/cashews

about 3/4 lb lunch meat
about 1/2 lb cheese
5 apples
3 bananas
1 small package of blueberries

I would def step up the amount of fruit and nuts that I got, but maybe split up the shopping trips to twice per week. Salad greens are better if you get one at a time (by the bottom of the second you are starting to get slimy leaves) and I like getting smaller containers of things like dressing and mayo because it seems to be fresher product...tho the idea of all those smaller containers in the recycling bin does hurt a little.

We also got cans of soup and things like brown rice and canned veggies and meats. We seem to be eating salmon chicken and steak predominantly.

This summer I am hoping to have a raised bed garden with things like herbs, tomatoes, sweet peas, leafy greens like arugula and chikory and spinach. We have a family of squirrels I am nervous about...hopefully I can compensate them enough that they won't need my fresh veggies! We found our holiday pumpkins with holes and the seeds and pulp dragged out this year..ha ha, it was cute.

I hope to get into canning this year as well. My husband spent some money last year and bought the entire new printed series of the Fox Fire Books, so I have a feeling I am going to learn a few other earthen things this year too!

Oh the itching...!

Hands free!

Sweet Baby Ru, you have the hiccups right now. You get them a lot!

You are active and vital! You amaze me everyday with how incredibly strong you are and how my skin holds you close to my deepest parts. Our birth class friends gave birth to their baby girl yesterday! She was 4 weeks early but ready and doing well.

I am so excited to meet you!! I can feel your little joints, hard and searching the scope of your reach. You have a hard little butt you like to press in between my rib cage while I'm trying to sleep at night. I picked up the Hypno Birth book again today and am going to make it a point to listen to the cd every day at least once now. We are getting pretty close...time to buy the liner and get the tub ^_^

This is me and my Mom at church ^_^

My dad is giving us my great grandmother's little rocking chair...low and armless but one of the only heirloom pieces I have of my family. I will also likely pass on my crib too. I am happy to have the chair because it will fit in the house even though we have almost no space. I asked for it and there was no hesitation so that was lovely ^_^ I think My dad is putting some of the family geneology on it as well ^_^

I am carrying her out in front of me now, and high. Skin is tight, belly is hard. Baby is growing. Oh my...soon life changes forever.

^_^

Colostrum!

I'm learning all about my new baby feeding boobs!

^_^

It started fairly early into the pregnancy...I'd undress and notice a bit of some strange white crust in my bra. What is THIS?! Well it doesn't hurt, must be nothing.

Now both sides are in full leak, and every day I make sure I spend some time squeezing it out so that by the time Runa gets here I will already have a good handle on how to help her nurse it out. I have been told with good practice my milk will come in 2 days after she is born, and in that 2 days she will feed off the colostrum and her "brown fat" that all babies are born with for those first 2 brand new days of life here.

It started as clear liquid, but now there are 2 types which mix once they work their way out. One is clear and one is a rich golden color. At first it made my nipples dry to coax it out but now it makes them soft. They still get a little dry but not like before. I am hoping to avoid as much of the nipple discomfort of newly nursing breasts as possible. By then it will be a bit warmer, so I do hope that will help.

Our exam with Rowan today went well. ^_^ I now weigh 142.4 pounds, and it's all baby. My last weigh in was 141. So Runa is gaining about a half a pound per week.

I was concerned that if Runa comes early Rowan may still be on vacation with her family, but she said Runa will be on time or late, and be in the 7 pound range. ^_^ That was majorly comforting. Once again, Runa favors the proper birthing position. Back always on my left side, head down, hiney pointed into my rib cage.

I feel very blessed to have had such a perfect pregnancy for my baby...it's been a struggle for me but for Runa it has been gentle and just perfect.

I have decided to look into teaching Hypno Birth in Carlisle at Simple Well. I felt that our classes were a bit far to travel and I didn't feel as connected to the teacher as I felt I could have been.

There are amazing things happening in Carlisle with Simply Well from an amazing Chiropractic practice to mothering support groups and all kinds of yoga classes! I'm feeling so glad that there is such a warm web of support for the way I want to raise my daughter. Also, immediately next to the Simply Well house is a Whole Foods store, AND some of my favorite shopping locations and restaurants in Carlisle right with in one block!!

Well, I'm off to relax a bit and try to find a comfortable position to sleep in...I've been battling the stomach flu I picked up from my husband while trying to finish up a big portrait commission and make time to nap. I'm really over a burning tummy after everything I eat...however hot water with a little honey seems to fix it up for a while.

xo